K: I was sitting in my chair and while I was sitting there,
I decided I would get myself a snack.
I got to the fridge and I poked about a smidge
and I found myself some pudding that I'd packed
I couldn't eat my pudding 'cause along came Cuba Gooding
Jr and he told me "Kyle I need your help!"
My name is Cuba Jr and I'm coming from the future
To ask for something I can't do myself.
I've come to the past 'cause I wanted to ask
If you'd star in "Doggy Day Camp" 'cause I can't.
I said "if Ian can come with me" and he said "that's kinda iffy"
But he said "ok", then did a magic chant.

I: So Kyle grabbed his phone and he called me at my home
and said "Ian, we're gonna make a movie!"
So I grabbed a plane pronto and I flew it to Toronto
'cause filming in Canada is more groovy
I said to Cuba Jr "well, I woulda been here sooner
but I wanted to re-write the whole damn script"
Well Kyle seemed happy 'cause he thought the first was crappy
But he read my version and his lid was flipped
He didn't like the part when Kyle walked on to fart
and then disappeared to ne'er be seen again
But I had to explain, as I sang him this refrain
"On the soundtrack you can play the theramin"

K: So, I dressed up like Tonto and flew over to Toronto
Despite the fact that I'm a big white dude.
I watched Ian perform, I was laughing up a storm.
And my fart scene was tasteful, although rude.
Jeff Garland remarked, "Man, at least you got a fart.
Ian made me wear a dog suit for no lines!"
I said, come on Jeffy G, and I'll let you play with me
We'll play the theramin at the same time!
The movie itself bombed, but my little woo-woo song
Was number one on every single chart.
Now Jeff and I are pallin' 'round. We'll be on next week's Fallon.
We formed the duo known as "No More Farts".

I: Well the band "No More Farts" had quickly topped the charts
So they decided to go on a world wide tour
They went to France and Turkey, then down to Albuquerque
And a couple places that are a bit obscure
They became world renowned and soon they had found
That everything they wanted they could have
But I felt slighted when Kyle and Jeff were knighted
and all I got was a t-shirt and a half
of a sandwich but Kyle just told me I should smile
even though he always says I should shut up
And even tho I'm sad I don't feel so bad
'cause I got Kyle's last pudding cup