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Kyle, Are You Ian?
lyrics by Ian Bonds and Kyle A. Carrozza
Music by Kyle (and Ross Bagdasarian)
I: Folks always know me as Insane Ian
That weird little gamer, nerdy human bein'
I'm kinda funny looking with real big hair
And I'm recognizable by my buggy eye'd stare
I'm quick with a joke and to make you laugh
I'm ok a rapping but terrible at math
I can't really draw, never really could
Just because I can polka, doesn't mean I should
But one day I encountered a terrible obscenity
I had my own case of Mistaken Identity
I had a pic of me taken at a con
But the tag on Facebook got the name wrong
Now folks who do what I do all have goofy names
And because we like "Weird Al" our voices kinda sound the same
But the guy I was mistaken for has his own unique style
He lives in California and his name is TV's Kyle!
Chorus:
I: Kyle, Are You Ian? K: (Ian, Are You Kyle?)
I: Kyle, Are You Ian? K: (Ian, Are You Kyle?)
I: Is this Kyle I'm seein'? I know it's been a while
But Kyle, Are You Ian? K: (And Ian, Are You Kyle?)
K: Ian, Are You Kyle? I: (Kyle, Are You Ian?)
K: Ian, Are You Kyle? I: (Kyle, Are You Ian?)
K: Is it Ian I'm seeing, or some other human bein'?
But Ian are You Kyle? I: (And Kyle Are You Ian?)
K: I'm not saying that there's no similarity
between Ian and I, but there's plenty of disparities
I know that we're both dementia acts,
but Ian does parodies and I would never do that
Ian is known to write video game reviews.
I just play them and I usually lose.
I'm really into Tezuka and Spirou et Fantasio
Possibly he'd like 'em, but I don't think Ian has heard of those
Ian's got a dog and I have two cats.
Ian is relatively thin and I am relatively fat.
Ian's more outgoing, not that I'm a wallflower
But in front of a mic, Ian commands the world's power
Ian is the world's biggest Presidents fan.
I mean, I like 'em too, but holy crap, man!
Ian wears shorts, I never do that.
He can actually rock a backwards hat!
Chorus
I: Now this little quandary has invaded my laundry
Kyle has all my shirts, I remember them fondly
K: I use them as rags to wash my dishes
Cause they fit kinda off by a few dozen inches
I: I'm suddenly drawing Kyle's webcomic now
K: And I'm on the East Coast, tho I don't know how
I: Could it be that we have finally switched places?
K: I am afraid that's what it looks like the case is.
K: Kyle, Are You Ian? I: (Ian, Are You Kyle?)
K: Kyle, Are You Ian? I: (Ian, Are You Kyle?)
K: Is this Kyle I'm seein'? I know it's been a while
But Kyle, Are You Ian? I: (And Ian, Are You Kyle?)
I: Ian, Are You Kyle? K: (Kyle, Are You Ian?)
I: Ian, Are You Kyle? K: (Kyle, Are You Ian?)
I: Is it Ian I'm seeing, or some other human bein'?
But Ian are You Kyle? K: (And Kyle Are You Ian?)
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Can't stand those guys hangin' around you all the time
They all want you, you're so nervous
In a word, you're like a Venus
Miracle girl you went from fantasy to life
From within my deepest desert
You're an undiscovered jewel
Just lean on me, I'll be here
No matter what happens
You're the one I won't give up on
Head to toe, I'm crazy for you
Even though I cannot see that two hearts can be one
Wanna believe it - - eye to eye
Every now and then, I wanna make sure that it's real
Don't you know, know, know...?
It's love.
Kissed by the sun, your tan's a color that's hard - won
Oh, I can't believe you're action
I get dizzy from the tension
On those rare nights I spend alone, not in your light
Tired eyes, darkened enigma
And the shadows keep me from you
Without you, nothin' goes right - - I'm just half alive
Style, smile
A to Z, I'm mad about you
Even though I cannot see that two hearts can be one
Wanna feel through it - - heart to heart
Every now and then, we gotta know for sure it's real
Don't you know, know, know...?
It's love.
When you're "you" again you'll soon become my one and my only
Show me all your tears, let me comfort all your fears
Show them just to me
I won't let you go; I won't go away
Stay like this with you forever more
Let the days pass as they may, my love
And then, someday we'll come together
Even though I cannot see that two hearts can be one
Wanna believe it - - eye to eye
Every now and then, I wanna make sure that it's real
Don't you know, know, know...?
Even though I cannot see that two hearts can be one
Wanna feel through it - - heart to heart
Every now and then, we gotta know for sure it's real
Don't you know, know, know...?
It's love.
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